Lwandle sighed heavily and sat on her bed staring in disbelief. She picked it up once more and shook her head at the two visible lines. There had to be a mistake, she thought to herself as she stood up and made her way to the bathroom clutching another kit she hadn't used.

Five minutes later the result was still the same and it dawned on her that this was her fate. She clutched her tummy and thought about the supposed being growing inside her. She wasn't ready, not yet. Pacing around the room, she asked herself what exactly had happened because she had been on her safe days that time. Just then, her phone rang.

"Hello? Bestie, are you there?"

Lwandle took a deep breath as she tried to stop hot tears from blinding her eyes.

"Yes yes, I'm here Ndoni. I'm here" She said forcing herself to sound okay.

"Have you used the test yet? You don't sound okay"

"I'm... it’s positive bestie. Ndoni I'm pregnant", Lwandle said holding back tears.

"I'm on my way. Let me cut the call.  Fifteen minutes I'll be there" Ndoni said hurriedly

Lwandle placed the phone on the bed as she cried pitifully clutching her tummy. She couldn't believe it. Why was this happening to her?  Fifteen minutes later Ndoni was at the door. A disheveled Lwandle opened the door and sank into her arms trying to stifle her cries. Ndoni led her to the bed and she sat in the coach.

"So, it’s really happening?" Ndoni mumbled eyeing the pregnancy test kits on the bed.

"Yep, and I have no idea what I'm going to do"

"It's easy, keep it. I mean at least you know Ndumiso won't deny responsibility. Plus, the other day you were telling me that he wants a baby. He has money Lwandle, your future is secure" Ndoni said pointedly.

Lwandle raised her eyebrows, "Keep it?! I should keep it? Ndoniyamanzi are you listening to yourself huh? What will I do with a baby? Ndumiso won't deny it I know, he'll probably jump at the opportunity and wife me because it's what he's always wanted but what about me? What about what I want? I still have to get this degree and I'm still in my second year. I still have crowns to win and most pageants don't accommodate ladies with children must less pregnant ones. No, I have to take care of this. I have finals that are set for December and by then it'll be showing. I can't, no!" Lwandle said breaking down.

Ndoni stood up and hugged her shushing her.

"I know baby, I know. I understand that pageantry is your life but girl you have enough crowns as it is. How many? You have three national titles and two international ones. You have lived your dream. I know this pregnancy is unplanned but just keep it. What if it's your only chance to be a mum?

Lwandle shook her head, "No, I'm not keeping it. My parents will kill me. I can't even begin to think of what the people at church will say. I won't be able to stand the embarrassment. I've worked too hard to maintain my good girl reputation and I'm not going to allow a baby to ruin it, never"

Ndoni slowly let go of her.

"So, what are you going to do then?"

Lwandle whispered in Ndoni’s ear.

"But Lwa..."

"No buts babes. I can't afford a baby." Lwandle rubbed her arms as she paced around the room. "I know someone who might be able to help me. I should ring him up"

Lwandle reached for her phone and had a brief conversation.

"He said it's $300. I don't have that kind of money now. I'm likely to get it month-end from that fashion show gig. Plus, I can't use my savings either because my mum monitors those. Oh gosh! You recently paid for your driving lessons so you probably don't have that kind of money lying around. What am I going to do?!" Lwandle said frustrated

"I'm flat broke babes. There's a cousin of mine who was once in trouble. This other lady helped her. I heard she's cheap, around $50 I think. I know you can afford that. But you did not get this from" said Ndoni as she dialed her cousin’s number.

Lwandle sighed heavily and sat on her bed staring in disbelief. She picked it up once more and shook her head at the two visible lines. There had to be a mistake, she thought to herself as she stood up and made her way to the bathroom clutching another kit she hadn't used.

Five minutes later the result was still the same and it dawned on her that this was her fate. She clutched her tummy and thought about the supposed being growing inside her. She wasn't ready, not yet. Pacing around the room, she asked herself what exactly had happened because she had been on her safe days that time. Just then, her phone rang.

"Hello? Bestie, are you there?"

Lwandle took a deep breath as she tried to stop hot tears from blinding her eyes.

"Yes yes, I'm here Ndoni. I'm here" She said forcing herself to sound okay.

"Have you used the test yet? You don't sound okay"

"I'm... it’s positive bestie. Ndoni I'm pregnant", Lwandle said holding back tears.

"I'm on my way. Let me cut the call.  Fifteen minutes I'll be there" Ndoni said hurriedly

Lwandle placed the phone on the bed as she cried pitifully clutching her tummy. She couldn't believe it. Why was this happening to her?  Fifteen minutes later Ndoni was at the door. A disheveled Lwandle opened the door and sank into her arms trying to stifle her cries. Ndoni led her to the bed and she sat in the coach.

"So, it’s really happening?" Ndoni mumbled eyeing the pregnancy test kits on the bed.

"Yep, and I have no idea what I'm going to do"

"It's easy, keep it. I mean at least you know Ndumiso won't deny responsibility. Plus, the other day you were telling me that he wants a baby. He has money Lwandle, your future is secure" Ndoni said pointedly.

Lwandle raised her eyebrows, "Keep it?! I should keep it? Ndoniyamanzi are you listening to yourself huh? What will I do with a baby? Ndumiso won't deny it I know, he'll probably jump at the opportunity and wife me because it's what he's always wanted but what about me? What about what I want? I still have to get this degree and I'm still in my second year. I still have crowns to win and most pageants don't accommodate ladies with children must less pregnant ones. No, I have to take care of this. I have finals that are set for December and by then it'll be showing. I can't, no!" Lwandle said breaking down.

Ndoni stood up and hugged her shushing her.

"I know baby, I know. I understand that pageantry is your life but girl you have enough crowns as it is. How many? You have three national titles and two international ones. You have lived your dream. I know this pregnancy is unplanned but just keep it. What if it's your only chance to be a mum?

Lwandle shook her head, "No, I'm not keeping it. My parents will kill me. I can't even begin to think of what the people at church will say. I won't be able to stand the embarrassment. I've worked too hard to maintain my good girl reputation and I'm not going to allow a baby to ruin it, never"

Ndoni slowly let go of her.

"So, what are you going to do then?"

Lwandle whispered in Ndoni’s ear.

"But Lwa..."

"No buts babes. I can't afford a baby." Lwandle rubbed her arms as she paced around the room. "I know someone who might be able to help me. I should ring him up"

Lwandle reached for her phone and had a brief conversation.

"He said it's $300. I don't have that kind of money now. I'm likely to get it month-end from that fashion show gig. Plus, I can't use my savings either because my mum monitors those. Oh gosh! You recently paid for your driving lessons so you probably don't have that kind of money lying around. What am I going to do?!" Lwandle said frustrated

"I'm flat broke babes. There's a cousin of mine who was once in trouble. This other lady helped her. I heard she's cheap, around $50 I think. I know you can afford that. But you did not get this from" said Ndoni as she dialed her cousin’s number.

Lwandle sighed heavily and sat on her bed staring in disbelief. She picked it up once more and shook her head at the two visible lines. There had to be a mistake, she thought to herself as she stood up and made her way to the bathroom clutching another kit she hadn't used.

Five minutes later the result was still the same and it dawned on her that this was her fate. She clutched her tummy and thought about the supposed being growing inside her. She wasn't ready, not yet. Pacing around the room, she asked herself what exactly had happened because she had been on her safe days that time. Just then, her phone rang.

"Hello? Bestie, are you there?"

Lwandle took a deep breath as she tried to stop hot tears from blinding her eyes.

"Yes yes, I'm here Ndoni. I'm here" She said forcing herself to sound okay.

"Have you used the test yet? You don't sound okay"

"I'm... it’s positive bestie. Ndoni I'm pregnant", Lwandle said holding back tears.

"I'm on my way. Let me cut the call.  Fifteen minutes I'll be there" Ndoni said hurriedly

Lwandle placed the phone on the bed as she cried pitifully clutching her tummy. She couldn't believe it. Why was this happening to her?  Fifteen minutes later Ndoni was at the door. A disheveled Lwandle opened the door and sank into her arms trying to stifle her cries. Ndoni led her to the bed and she sat in the coach.

"So, it’s really happening?" Ndoni mumbled eyeing the pregnancy test kits on the bed.

"Yep, and I have no idea what I'm going to do"

"It's easy, keep it. I mean at least you know Ndumiso won't deny responsibility. Plus, the other day you were telling me that he wants a baby. He has money Lwandle, your future is secure" Ndoni said pointedly.

Lwandle raised her eyebrows, "Keep it?! I should keep it? Ndoniyamanzi are you listening to yourself huh? What will I do with a baby? Ndumiso won't deny it I know, he'll probably jump at the opportunity and wife me because it's what he's always wanted but what about me? What about what I want? I still have to get this degree and I'm still in my second year. I still have crowns to win and most pageants don't accommodate ladies with children must less pregnant ones. No, I have to take care of this. I have finals that are set for December and by then it'll be showing. I can't, no!" Lwandle said breaking down.

Ndoni stood up and hugged her shushing her.

"I know baby, I know. I understand that pageantry is your life but girl you have enough crowns as it is. How many? You have three national titles and two international ones. You have lived your dream. I know this pregnancy is unplanned but just keep it. What if it's your only chance to be a mum?

Lwandle shook her head, "No, I'm not keeping it. My parents will kill me. I can't even begin to think of what the people at church will say. I won't be able to stand the embarrassment. I've worked too hard to maintain my good girl reputation and I'm not going to allow a baby to ruin it, never"

Ndoni slowly let go of her.

"So, what are you going to do then?"

Lwandle whispered in Ndoni’s ear.

"But Lwa..."

"No buts babes. I can't afford a baby." Lwandle rubbed her arms as she paced around the room. "I know someone who might be able to help me. I should ring him up"

Lwandle reached for her phone and had a brief conversation.

"He said it's $300. I don't have that kind of money now. I'm likely to get it month-end from that fashion show gig. Plus, I can't use my savings either because my mum monitors those. Oh gosh! You recently paid for your driving lessons so you probably don't have that kind of money lying around. What am I going to do?!" Lwandle said frustrated

"I'm flat broke babes. There's a cousin of mine who was once in trouble. This other lady helped her. I heard she's cheap, around $50 I think. I know you can afford that. But you did not get this from" said Ndoni as she dialed her cousin’s number.